In search of the Great Perhaps

I have moved my website once again to http://erinholdren.shutterfly.com/ Check it out there!

As most of you know I have decided to move yet again but this time it's back in with another person. A different roommate. It's a friend I have had for quite awhile and I am excited for the move but I have come to one conclusion. PACKING IS THE WORST! The one good thing about moving though is that you get to purge alot of stuff if not just for the fact that you don't want to pack it and haul it all with you. I think I have listed more stuff on Craigslist than ever before!
Another bad thing, especially for those of you who know me well, is the disorganization it causes and the stress that goes along with that. I am the type of person that has everything in its place. I hate things just laying around and cluttering up good space. Therefor my place right now is stressing me out! I just started really packing today and here's what it looks like thus far.



Most of you are probably thinking to yourselves, well that's not so bad, but for me it is! I move Sunday and had to start packing today because for the next 3 days I work 14 hour shifts and cannot pack so the disarray began early. Too early in my opinion because now I have to set eyes on the hazard that is my living room for the next 5 days.
Don't even get me started on the bedroom.......

Amber, here ya go! The picture of the shameful "mullet convention" that used to be my hair. (and my sisters at that) Enjoy and laugh away!

3 months and 5 days on the market, 2 price drops, hundreds of walk thru's, ALOT of praying, and voila: House sold! It is official, my parents have sold their house. Contracts have been signed, move out dates have been determined and moving companies have been notified. My parents couldn't be happier. Richard will be coming back into town on July 10th and their plan is to be on the road by the 16-17 depending on how all the packing/loading goes.

I don't know what my obsession is with scary movies or when it really started but they are my favorite. When asked by people why that is I always say, "I don't really know. I think it's the feeling of getting all scared and feeling silly about it after." Which is true. I KNOW scary movies aren't real but at the same time I find myself coming home after watching one and checking under all the beds and in the closets before I go to sleep.
Today I went and saw what is in my opinion, one of the scarier movies I have seen in awhile. It is called "The Strangers" and is inspired by true events....which I nor my friend knew before we went to see this movie. It wasn't just the movie that was scary though. Since this movie has been out for a couple weeks and it was the early afternoon when we went to go see it, the movie theater was pretty bare...except for 2 men. My friend and I walked in and sat down in the front where the 2 sections of the theater are split. (and there's that bar you can put your feet up on) One guy sat about 3 rows up on our right and the other guy sat in the row behind us to our left. It was creepy to say the least. I watched the 2 guys out of my peripheral vision all the way thru the movie! They moved one inch and I was craning my head their way to see why the movement....I was a freak! (and I am pretty sure they knew it)
Besides the 2 guys the movie was pretty freaky in itself. Combine a house in the woods (of course) a couple in a rocky relationship, and 3 killers on the loose all sporting LOVELY masks, and you've got yourself an hour and a half of heart stopping fun! Needless to say it is now 10:17 at night. I saw the movie almost 12 hours ago and it is still fresh on my brain.
We will see how much sleep I get tonight.

Since attempt #1 at geocaching was so fruitful we decided to do it again and test our luck...this time with Ben and Amber. We set out pretty early again in the morning (around 10:30) and it was a BEAUTIFUL day! We decided to do one at a park very close by as our first and go harder after that. Ben found the first cache pretty easily. We documented it and were off to find the second.



Our second cache was located somewhere in Forrest Park, which if you have been there, is HUGE! We found the trail that our clue told us to follow and started walking. We walked about a mile into the forrest and the GPS "stopped" working because there were too many trees for the satellites to find the unit. We knew the general area it needed to be in so we went off trail, 4 separate ways, and started searching. It said it was by a fir tree...which there were about 100 of. It said it was by a stump...which there were about 1000 of. After about 45 minutes of looking, various scratches and bugs all over us, several times where one or more of us fell and slid down hills and debating whether or not to give up about 10 times, the GPS honed back in and we were about 100 feet away from where we should have been. Ben started leading us in the correct direction and about 15 minutes later found the damn thing! Needless to say a few choice words were left for the creators of that cache. Good job Ben!

Linds and I were talking yesterday and towards the end of our conversation we made plans to hang out today (Saturday) and go geocaching. For those of you who don't know, geocaching is pretty much a worldwide treasure hunt using GPS. (you should reasearch it online, it is pretty neat)
We tentatively made plans to head out at 10:30 depending on the weather cause we didn't want to go in a downpour...that is no fun! So this morning when I woke up it was partly cloudy and the sun was peeking through and it looked like it was going to be a pretty nice day. I got to Lindsay's and we printed out some caches that we wanted to try and find and headed out the door. After a few pit stops (this would consist of Noah's Bagels for breakfast and Starbucks) we got to our first cache off of highway 99. We found it within 10 minutes of being there hidden in a hollow pole by a tree. This cache was conveniently located on the grounds of a 7-11 so Linds and I HAD to go in and get slurpees. (they just sounded soooo good!)


Off to find the second cache. It was located somewhere in forest heights park. After finding parking and following the GPS unit we had we ended up in the middle of a HUGE open space surrounded by towering spruce trees and lots of hiking trails. We split up and started searching for this cache. After about 15 minutes of looking and nothing found we decoded the clue that would hopefully help us to find the cache. It told us to look by a stump. We looked around some more and STILL couldn't find it Linds decided to check to make sure we had put in the coordinates right.
Sure enough....they were wrong.
After putting in the correct coordinates and getting back in the car we then drove the almost 4 miles we were off by to the correct park. As we drove to the park it had started to snow and gradually began to hail. I am not talking about a little hail here either. Hail the size of small marbles at times and coming down in masses! It hurt to walk in it was coming down that hard and fast. We got into the forest where we were mostly sheltered and saw about a thousand stumps that this cache could be hidden by, under, or in. We started searching the stumps and Linds found it about 10 minutes into our quest. Got back to my car which was now covered in about 3 inches of ice pellets and drove home.
It was a great couple of hours in which I don't think I have laughed as hard as I did in quite awhile. It also taught us that in Oregon, the weather can change in a split second so go prepared!

I innocently went over to my parents house one Sunday afternoon 2 weeks ago and was chatting with my mom when I heard a strange noise coming from the family room. I tried to ignore it for awhile as I was having a pretty good conversation going but after about 10 minutes I had to go investigate. The "banging" noise turned out to be my brother...not so strange. What was strange was the contraption he was hitting which looked like a set of drums but did not sound like one. Upon looking closer I saw he was playing a game on his XBox 360 entitled Rockband. This game might be the single most coolest invention EVER!
I watched him for about 5 minutes then could stand it no longer, I HAD to have a turn. Needless to say I found out I am not a drum player, a guitar player, or a singer. (as I knew almost none of the songs and could not hit the correct pitch at the correct times) This did not stop me from playing though. As my brother laughed and played the guitar, I unceremoniously banged away at the drums in an attempt to hit the right notes as they slid (way too fast mind you) under the bar. After about 2 hours I could rhythmically play a few songs and get in the 90% level for a song. (on easy mode)
I then tried medium mode thinking I was too cool for the game and therefor could (of course) take on a higher level. The game put me in my place. I made 3 attempts, got 3 X's and lost the gig for my brother and I.
Good thing my brother doesn't care.....

A few weeks ago my parents sat my brother and I down and told us that they were going to be moving back to Texas. I wasn't too surprised at the time because they had been talking about moving for quite awhile and with Drew graduating high school this summer it was the perfect time for them to do so. Needless to say, it was a sad time.
At the time my brother was thinking of moving with them to Texas so that he could stay rent free in their house and go to a community college there for awhile. This saddened me even more because then I would have no family in the area at all. Closest would have been Billy, Holly, and Jamie in San Clemente, Ca which is a 17 hour car ride and not close enough.
After thinking about it for awhile my brother has decided to stay here in Oregon and rent an apartment with a friend and go to PCC. He got a full time job at the church and is now not worried about finances being too difficult for him to handle. My sister, Jamie, also decided that California was not working out for her so she is moving back to Oregon sometime within the next month and a half. God works in miraculous ways!
Rchard took a job in Texas working with his son Evan in real estate. Evan owns a buisness entitled "The Matteson Group" and is the leading sales agent in real estate in his city. Richard is getting his license in the next few months and is also continuing his buisness of life coaching on the side. They found a house down there for sale that they liked and put an offer on it and the offer got accepted so now all they have to do is sell their house here. Please pray that it sells within the next 2 months as that is the time frame that my mom will be going to join Richard in Texas. (Drew graduates early June)
Richard and my mom are both excited to be moving back to Texas where they enjoyed living but it will also be bittersweet because they will be leaving behind 3 of their 5 kids. Family has always been VERY important to all of us and we are a close knit family. It will be healthy to sever some of those ties but also very sad at the same time.

You know when your brain is so full that you can't even begin to put down into words, much less sentences, things that have been going on in your world? Well, that's me right now. I have Thursday off so I am hoping to be able to sit down then and hash out some of what has been swirling around in my noggin so that I can make a ledgible post out of it all.
Stay tuned for the rantings of a few long weeks past!

This is what I saw when I looked out my window the other night and all I could think was "beautiful". I sat out on my deck for what felt like hours (but was only long enough to shoot a few frames) as the freezing wind made my cheeks sting and my eyes water. It never ceases to amaze me the beauty of the things God creates.
I feel blessed to be living where I do. Not only do I live within close walking distance to a grocery store, a Blockbuster and my bank but also to the best Starbucks around. I very often find myself walking to this Starbucks at least twice a week. The reason is not only to get good coffee that makes me all warm inside and keeps me awake, but also because of the walk itself. No matter if it is raining, windy, sunny, or snowy I find myself smiling all the way to the store simply because of the beauty around me. Trees, flowers, buildings, people...they all have something to give if you only take the time to see it.
I have tried to make a point of slowing down in my life in order to "see" what all is around me. It's amazing what you find you miss.

Well, as I have started the countdown till my birthday, 1 hour and 45 minutes to go till I turn 29, I thought I would write about recent things.
I recently returned from California where I got to spend good quality time with my family.

My stepbrother Evan and his wife Virginia were in attendance and that was a whole nother level of fun! It has been some time since I had seen Evan so it was good to get caught up on what was going on in his life. I had never met Virginia and she is great and fit right in with our family . . scary as that is!
It was so sunny and warm the entire time we were there which was great coming from rainy and cold Oregon. I even came back with a LITTLE tan! :)
Another big thing that happened was Ben and Ambers wedding. I got to get all dolled up and put on a pretty dress for the occasion which is always fun and such an honor. The wedding was lots of fun and very gorgeous. Renjy did an exceptional job for it being his first wedding and Amber could not have been more beautiful.






I am very excited for the next 3 weeks because I get vacation! One of the families I nanny for are gone and so I get 3 days off every week...all to myself...don't really know what to do with all that time but I am sure I will find something to occupy my time. If you wanna hang out give me a call!

I got to read tonight which if you know me is something I LOVE to do and don't get to do too often. I turned on the fire (gotta love gas fireplaces) set up a makeshift "bed" on the floor and read for 3 straight hours. The only bad thing is I finished my book and don't have anything else to read. Any suggestions?

Only 1 hour and 29 minutes left till my birthday. I guess I should go to bed. Drywalling is being done on my condo in the morning (YAY...no) and they are getting here bright and early.

In just one week from today I will be headed, with my family, to California to celebrate Thanksgiving a week early with my brother in law and 2 sisters. Words cannot express how excited I am to be going! Richards son Evan and his wife will also be joining us there and I haven't seen him in years and have never met Virginia so it should be fun.
Vacation . . . . even just thinking about it makes me smile. Nine whole days of NOTHING TO DO! Granted there are one or two things here that I don't want to have to leave but I will always be coming back to them so I guess it is okay. I look forward to sunny days, clear nights, daily beach visits, LOTS of bocce ball, and plenty of good conversation to go around.
Stay tuned for many pictures to come.

I am finally at a place now where I am happy with where I am at. It's been a struggle to get there but I finally achieved what I have been seeking and am content. It's such a great feeling! Living situation/feelings are MUCH better. I look forward to the quiet times I have at home and look forward even more to the times I get to go out with friends but at least I am not depressed about it anymore.
Amber, Ben and I planned on going to the pumpkin patch today to pick out pumpkins and carve them but it is too wet. Another weekend possibly. Haunted houses fast approaching and I am way excited about that! We didn't go last year as Amber and I had a pact that we wouldn't because they scare us too much but this year I HAVE to go. I do get scared but at the same time it is so much fun to get scared! Then there's the halloween party at Amber's we are putting together on the 28th at 6pm. If you want to come, come! Just let me know that you will be joining as we are supplying some of the drinks/food. Costumes are optional but encouraged and we are asking everyone to bring some sort of munchie to share.
I went to Target the other day and saw that they already have out Christmas things! I stopped, stared, and a lady behind me said, "I know, it's disgusting isn't it?" I don't think it is disgusting but it definitely is NOT the right time to be putting that stuff out. There's still 2 holidays to celebrate before Christmas even comes! Two months! A little premature if you ask me but then Costco put out there Christmas things mid August so I guess Target is a little late in getting on the bandwagon.
The other night I was at my parents and the power went out. It was very cool. We got out a bunch of candles and had a lot of fun. (The only bummer is that I didn't get to watch The Office or Grey's Anatomy) I got some pictures of the "blackout" and I will post them soon. Some of them are way funny.
Sorry this post is so all over the place, these are just the thoughts floating through my head right now.

So I have now been in my new place for a week and I like my new place and feel really safe there. But it does have its drawbacks also. In the week I have lived there I have not seen anyone on my floor which makes me conclude that everyone is too old to leave their condos in the place. I see grocery services delivering groceries, postal workers delivering mail to doors, and tri met buses with handicap access pulling up to doors and loading up. It's weird. I am used to noise, busyness, and seeing life. It gets lonely.
Worst of all is that with my fall schedule starting up I work 10-12 hour days and don't get to see any friends for days at a time. At least when I lived with Amber and came home at some ungodly hour I knew she would be there, probably awake, and I could share a few words with someone before retreating to slumber. Now, not so much!
People have told me it will take about a month or two to fully get used to living alone so I am hoping that that time goes by quickly.

Amber and I were going thru our kitchen stuff seeing what all was hers or mine so we knew what we had to buy. I was squatting down on the floor and I held up this wooden platter that was pretty heavy over my head so she could see it. I don't know if it was the angle I was holding it at or if I just didn't have a good grip on the thing but it swiveled out of my hand, rotating downward, and hit me in the temple. I swear to you, it actually made that hollow sound effect that you hear in movies when someone gets hit in the head! I could see it coming out of the corner of my eye so I am sure my face was CLASSIC as it swung down towards me. Amber actually fell off her chair she was laughing so hard. It definately made the top 5 funniest moments in our apartment.

Thank you all for your prayers as I looked for an apartment these past few months! The search is FINALLY over and I have a new place to live. As of August 29th, I will be living in the Rock Creek 185 apartments right off of 185th. One of their "bigger" studios opened up miraculously and I put a deposit down before they could say otherwise. It will definitely take some getting used to living on my own so I ask for your continued prayers as I make that transition in the month to come. But God is good and He provides!

UPDATE TO ENTRY::::
I moved into the Promenade at Bethany Village and like it much better than I think I would have liked Rock Creek 185.

My vacation in California was excellent. My sisters both had time off from work somewhat so we got to hang out quite a bit as well as Billy. I felt kinda bad for Billy in a way what with 3 women in the house non stop and no dudes for him to hang out with. It was only for a week though and I am pretty sure he survived!
Highlights of the trip include (but are not limited to):
The beach and playing bocce ball. For those of you who have not played bocce ball it is a blast if you play with the right people. We had a speed round one time because when Billy threw the ball it kinda got really close to where the waves were hitting the beach and we didn't want the balls getting drug out to sea. The last ball was being thrown and this HUGE wave came up and covered all our balls and started dragging them out, all at the same time, into the surf. We all ran yelling ito the surf trying to find these balls and pick them up before they got buried in the sand. We managed to get 7 of the 8 bigger balls (which probably weigh about 5 lbs each), plus the yellow smaller ball (weighs about as much as a golf ball) but sadly lost one to the sea. We must have looked for that ball, waist deep in the cold surf, about 20 minutes hoping that it would somehow make its way back up to the shore. Needless to say even with the sadness in our hearts of the lost ball, Billy and I played the game out neither of us wanting to call game done till their was a definite winner. (there is definitely NO competitive spirit amongst ANY of my family members . . .HA!)
Sea World with Jamie. Holly and Billy had to work sadly but Jamie and I drove to Sea World Tuesday and stayed from open to close seeing all the shows and riding the 2 very wet rides they have there to help people cool down from the heat. I was never a big fan of Sea World growing up and would get out of going whenever the opportunity arose but now I didn't mind it so much. It's Jamie's favorite place on Earth s I was happy to oblige this time. We went and saw Shamu (which now it turns out they name them ALL Shamu after the original Shamu died) and saw some people get utterly soaked from the show. It was hilarious! There's this one part in the show where the trainers have everyone chant this little ditty they put together and it reminded me very much of a strange cult. I did not participate, just sat back and watched the fun unfold. It was a great day!

Seeing Holly, Billy, and Jamie's new condo. Only last month did they move in and it's so fun to see how people decorate things. They all 3 were living in a 1 bedroom, 1 bath apartment and the new condo is 3 bedrooms, 2 1/2 bathrooms and about triple the space they had! Everyone is much happier now.
Starbucks runs. Jamie and I went to Starbucks a few times and just hung out and talked like old times. It was nice, I haven't done that in awhile with anyone.
Seeing Margot. My sisters puppy, who will be 1 in August, is the cutest little thing ever! I love her to pieces and miss seeing her so much. She slept with me the first night and then first thing every morning after that she would run upstairs and jump on my bed to say hello.

Just being with my family. NOTHING beats being with family. I am sad that they live farther away than I would like but it is nice to know that they are never more than a 2 1/2 hour plane flight away. God put them all there for a reason and it is fun to hear of how God is using them to reach the people of San Clemente.

I leave for California tomorrow and absolutely cannot WAIT till that plane takes off. It will be a much needed vacation and restful period which I am in desperate need of right now. I will be gone for 6 days, wish it could be more but alas there is that little thing called work to come back to. It does pay the bills after all. . . .
I am excited to lay out by the beach, by the pool, with my SISTERS !!! I never realized how much I would miss them till they weren't here anymore. A phone conversation just isn't enough these days. The weather should be cooperative, like it usually is in southern California. Although I looked at the weather report for here and it is supposed to be sunny the whole time I am gone. I wish I were leaving when it was raining to just make it THAT much better!
Going to go to San Diego and visit Sea World because it is my sister Jamie's favorite place to be! I haven't been in awhile so hopefully I won't dislike it like I used to. (I'm not a big fan of the smell OR the inhabitants) Also will be doing some shopping at the mall where my sister got her managers job. Other than that though I just want to breathe the beach. Play some bocce ball and walk for hours on the beach.
One of my favorite places to be.